weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
