ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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