She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
she pinky promised me she was 18
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
