there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize