i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
