Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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