hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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