new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
