You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
