so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
