So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
