Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize