Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize