Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize