hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
