what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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