Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
