so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
