I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Randomize
