Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
