It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
