I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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