So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
operation harelip BJ is a go
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize