you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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