i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Found the puke drawer
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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