I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Green mimosas i think yes
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
