So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize