Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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