Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Couch. On fire.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
