It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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