I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
