i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
