OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
