As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
The air taste purple.
Randomize
