is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
