Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize