sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
