Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
