you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize