OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize
