i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
