Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
