I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Randomize