I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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