what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
