lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Randomize