do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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