The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
