Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
