i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Use "feeling words"
Yay
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Randomize
