how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
